Dark Peace Chronicle, My Very First Original Work Ever Published

So I was wondering if you ever wonder whether I have my own original work or not. Well, I do. And it is a result of three years composing. Thinking back it is ridiculous how I need three whole years to finish one Novel. Well, I got pretty much attached to the characters so when I finished the work, I got really lonely. I felt like a parents whose kids have grown up and left to face the world.
... ...
Any way, here's my work and the synopsis.

Dark Peace Chronicle (cover)

Jill tidak menyangka saat dia memutuskan untuk mengingkari takdirnya dengan kabur dari Jail, sebenarnya dia tidak mengingkari tadir siapapun. Siapa yang tahu takdir? Tidak ada. Jill tidak tahu bahwa kabur dari Jail memang takdirnya. Takdir bukan sesuatu yang selemah itu.

Meski tak ingin mengakuinya, Jambrong si petani bayaran yang muda dan berbakat dan baru tiga tahun menikmati hari-hari membosankan lepas kelulusannya dari Akademi Begundal sebenarnya sadar kehidupan terlalu konstan yang dijalaninya tidak baik bagi kesehatan. Jadi saat ada gadis kacamata buronan yang berlari minta tolong padanya, hati kecilnya sedikit senang dengan perubahan keadaan kecil itu. Jambrong tidak bisa membaca masa depan jadi dia tidak tahu dia akan mengalami ketidak membosakannan yang paling drastis dalam hidupnya setelah itu.

Richard adalah pria ganteng berambut pirang yang kini dikutuk menjadi kerbau akibat suatu hal mistis. Bahkan sebelum masa-masa kutukannya, dia sudah merasa hidupnya cukup hancur. Jadi saat partner-nya, si petani bayaran, memutuskan untuk ikut campur dalam urusan gadis kacamata yang tidak jelas bibit, bebet, dan bobotnya, dia merasa hidupnya sudah tak bisa lebih hancur lagi dan memutuskan untuk tak keberatan dan menonton pertunjukkan hidup seperti apa yang akan mereka mainkan setelah ini.

Kisah perdamaian macam apa ini?

Bagaimana bisa Jill berubah status dari tahanan, menjadi buronan, kemudian menjadi majikan, kemudian menjadi budak, bahkan jadi maling jemuran?

Bagaimana dia bisa bertemu dengan seorang petani yang punya kerbau yang bisa jadi manusia? Kenapa tentara negara mengejarnya?! Dan bagaimana semua kegilaan konyol ini berhubungan dengan takdir Buvana?

Sebuah kisah mengenai perang, perjuangan, kebencian, kedamaian, dan kegilaan yang menyusun semua itu. 

***
 
If you are interested in buying, you can e-mail me or contact me on so many ways you can do, or you can order it right away here 

If you are one of the little view who had already read it, your opinions are all very welcomed ^^  

Thanatos, the Loving God of Death

Just got nothing to do and my Playlist played Meiou (Sound Horizon's 6th Story CD "Moira" track 1) and it is pretty much featuring Thanatos and how he sees "Death" as a salvation in live.

Truee enough, people will eventually wither and come back to the ground. There is no such thing as eternity in this world. Beauties will shatter and crumbles. No matter what you do, whether you lead a happy and wonderful life or a cruel life of poverty and sadness, you will eventually meet the same end. Death. It is the ultimate salvation for your life in the world.

Unlike what usually happens in this world, where those with more money or good look will be easier to love, Thanatos loves everyone equally. That is why he saves everyone no matter how poor and unsightly they are, no matter how beautiful and rich they are. Thanatos loves them all and will save them from the cruel hand of Moira, the goddess of Fate. Well that is from the point of view of Thanatos and those humans that have been getting cruel fate all their life. That is why those who hates fate will tend to side with Thanatos. Siding with "death". Have you got where this is heading? Another clue then: suicides

Thinking at this, this might be the Greek's explanation for suicides phenomenon happening back than. From the point of view of a happy people leading normal life without too much twist of fate, it does not make sense why someone would want to end one's own life willingly. But then in the point of view of the people tempted by the idea of suicide, it does really make sense. Fate is cruel for some people and by making the figure of Moira, the goddess of Fate, it is possible for those who are toyed by fate to have object to blame for their miserable life. While for them who are already tired of this world that seems to be toying with them giving them twists and turns, will want to escape from this world and that means they have to find another world. Hades... Thanatos is the personification of Death that will eventually come to everyone equally, regardless of the position, fortune, and any other worldly things. That is their savior.

Thanatos from Sound Horizon's MOIRA... Parodying over Tonari no Totoro, a Ghibli Movie XD

I heard the name Thanatos is also used in this modern days. It is a term to describe a powerful will to die happening in certain people. I found someone with this in a Japanese drama though. The character Kairi in Japanese Drama, LOVE SHUFFLE is an acute Thanatos syndrom sufferer. She has no willing of life and tends to be suicidal when no one is keeping watch. She even halucinates of meeting Thanatos coming to pick her up

"Chinureta hanayome mukai ni yukou~" (I have come to pick you up, o blood-covered bride)

Maybe Kairi listen to MOira too much XD

Night Cry, 'cuz I Have Tears Like You Do

It's past midnight and I'm crying right now reading my e-mai. Why you ask?

Dunno. Probably all the pent up frustration got blurted out with that one simple e-mails telling me to revise my work from days ago. Okay. Since it's my blog, MY Trash Bin, I'm gonna trashing around here.

So it's been a few weeks since the admin of my working place got annoying with all of his/ her mistakes and vague instruction for my works. After all those times, I put up and held back my emotion. I settled the thing down. I managed to pass that. But hey, he admin doesn't stop messing with me! This time he came back with a revision work from two days ago! And not to mention there are also those of yesterday's work, as well as today's work. Well done. Now my frustration also bursting out like the mountains of revision that I had to do.

Sure, it all happens because I made the mistakes from the start. If I were bright enough to do all those things well with the half-assed instruction, then I wouldn't have to do the revsion.

All well ends well. All bad ends worst. Okay, I bought that to myself. And now I'm cleaning up the mess.

Sorry for being a drama queen over such a simple thing. Thanks for listening. I feel better.

And message to myself: Next time, read the instruction real well before starting your job.
Jill(?): How the heck am I supposed to read it every time when the opening is always the same?! You admins better stop copy-pasting the old instructions and only adding a few tid bits of changes!!!
AnotherJill: Well, you're the employee so that's your fault for not wanting to be at the top,
Jill(?): Ck. I prefer down here cursing at those above rather than flew up there and being cursed by those bellow me!
AnotherJill: No one will curse you if you do everything properly.
Jill(?): What is proper anyway?
AnotherJill: ... ... ... Okay that's it. Jill's being delusional (again).

I'm So Pathetic My Ear Cries Blood

... ... What's that about? Well, that's about how my left ear splits blood and going 75% deaf temporary (I really hope so). And how did it turned out like this again? Well, I haven't tell you anything actually so let's start from the day a doctor make fun of hardened earwax at the very back of my ear.

By the way, serumen is what you call cerumen is the medical term for ear recess. It is usually gathering inside the ear and will be pushed out to our ear lobe as we eat, speak, laugh, etc. Some cases might lead to hardening of the cerumen just like in my case.

So, back to the story. I woke up in Wednesday morning, feeling like my left ear got some water in it. I tried to shake it off but it didn't work and I still half-deaf. I panicked and the memory of my friend telling me her story of getting Herpes inside your ear makes you deaf, dizzy, feverish, and have trouble in moving flowing back in, raising my panic even more. I called my mom and she told me to go to near by Puskesmas where my Aunt works. By the way, I realize that I'm still a spoiled child even in my twenties. Kind of pathetic the fact that I had to get my mom telling to go to the hospital when I actually already know what to do. Guess that's another thing to fix. Later though. Bleeding ear comes first.

After that, I went there and got my ear examined. And~ here comes the doctor joking around. The doctor is actually pretty kind and not that intimidating. He might be in his late twenties or mid thirties. Wearing glasses and a mask. He took a look at my ear and then, saying "Aw, it's just cerumen hardening at the back of your ear." saying that nonchalantly while giving prescription for a medication to liquidify (is that even a word? :s) the earwax. And the first though coming up to my mind was ," Why didn't you just say 'earwax'?" O well, that goes, I applied the medication. It has to be dropped exactly three drops on each ear. Each ear will require you to lay on your side and wait for the liquid to take action for 10 minutes. Not an easy task to do on campus. My friend saw me laying sideway at the Mosque and said I looked so wasted. Nyahaha. Good point. I WAS wasted anyway. It hurted like hell >.< And I couldn't hear my surrounding well. Being in a place with lots of noises but you can't make that out well is really suffocating. But then there are things I have to do so I endured that Wednesday on campus.
At night, it hurts even more! It Hurts like hell and I can only moaning in pain without able to do anything. The pathetic feeling was similar to when you have sever toothache but can do nothing to ease the pain even for just a little.

Next morning came. Actually I want to spend the day not doing anything and letting my ear have its deserved rest. But then this friend of mine insist that everyone at the boardinghouse will have to go on a karaoke as a commemoration of the end of the semester test. Well, I'm sick of dealing with her tantrum when things doesn't goes as she planned so I come along. I said we should just have two hours of karaoke but she said it should be three hours. Well, whatever, I came along. And it came true. The last one hour of the deafening room, I lay still, grimacing as my ear started to acted up.

Okay. Then we went home and I went to my Aunt's house. Spending the night there. I was tired after the karaoke and My ear still hurt like hell, so I drank the medicine, drop the liquid, and went to sleep. At 3 AM I woke up and started to do the part time job while grumbling. I actually wanted to say that I was sick and wanted a day off, but I would feel defeated that way. So I decided to be stubborn and pretend to be strong enough to write even when my ear keep gnawing on my consciousness.

Morning came, I had only a few hours of sleep and my ear was still deaf. At 8 I came to the Puskemas and there, the doctor was ready to do the operation. I thought it would go as quickly and would feel nothing, but O how universe love to tease me and broke any of my expecation. It hurst like hell when the doctor put some metal stick to take off the earwax. Even thet, he twisted the stick makes me feel like my head was going too explode of too excessive pain from the ear.  I held back my tears as much as I could, and he did that twisting AGAIN! I moaned in pain but keep my head still. And after that dreadful minutes, the doctor said that there was a pimple there inside so we have to make the pimple cured before taking the earwax.

I felt like mashing the doctor hear and there.

AFter that it took one week for the pimple to be cured, and then the earwax was vacuumed off of my ear. I thoght my brain was going to be vacuumed out too.

Well, that was the end. I finally realized how wonderful it is to have two functioning ears. How I had been abusive to my ears and not taking good care of it.

Knock Knock Baby Has Knocks the Door

Huho, back to my Time Capsule. Looks like this blog has finally have an actual use instead of just being my 'Trash Bin' of dirty thoughts and twisted mumbling. So in my Creative Writing class, mas Dalih, the class' lecturer told us to make a reaction to a baby left at the front of our door. Lots of things were rushing to my mind so I'm gonna write it down here.

So, when there is a baby left at my front door.

I was just finished with my tenth round of Digimon Rumble Arena and that was my ninth lost to my older brother who was annoyingly good at beating me up to frustration. I couldn't stand another loosing so I gave up and let my bro tease me all he want about me chickening out. Whatever.

I then was going to go out and have a breathe of the afternoon air to cool off, when the door was being knocked from the other side, stopping me from turning the knob of the door. After a second of shock, I turned the knob and my heart leaped to my throat seeing the bundle of clothing inside a small fruit basket.

'This is too cliche!!!' my mind screamed. 'Leaving a baby inside a basket is too much of a cliche! If you're gonna leave a baby, at least put it in something more dramatic like in small UFO capsule so I could think that the baby is an alien and will keep it by my side instead of just ignore the bundle or give it to an orphanage!'

But that would be too cruel and I'm playing the nice normal and sane girl here, so I felt pity for the bundle of clothing. It wriggles and I gasped. The scenario on what to do quickly running through my head. I could simply take the baby in, put a shocked expression as my family would soon also do upon hearing "There's a baby left at our porch." from me holding the basket. There, my mom would quickly come to me and start checking the baby before screaming at me for not taking the baby out of the basket, and my brother would just gap without doing anything really useful. My Father would immediately thinking about looking for an orphanage to look after the baby. Then I would butt in with my pessimistic view on what if the orphanage wouldn't take babies without any background. No one retalite. Dead end.

Then I changed the simulation course to the possibility of me taking the baby in the basket, ride on my motor bike, and then put the baby at someone else's front porch. Seems good enough for me that time. And I already went back inside the house and come back out with my helmet and motor key. When I grab the basket and the baby wriggled again from under the blanket, I stopped.

This is a bundle of life in my hand. The baby is alive just like me and the rest f the living things in the whole world. It can have  bright future of life and happiness and it could also be taken into a drastic turn and fast forwarding to a track of dark life of slavery or human traffic without the protection called 'Family'. And that very future is now in my hand. My responsibility. I was struck by all the thought of everything bad that might happen to the baby because of me. That would be my fault. If the baby were to die after I left it again, that would be because of me. I thought that was one of my guilty complex acting up again. But then guilty complex or not, I knew as much as the fact that I was then responsible to the future of the baby in the basket.

Just when I was planing to take a turn and be a gentle and loving girl taking in the baby and decided to take it in as the member of family, come the thought of how troublesome it will be for having a new little child in the household. Let alone I'm not that fond of babies. Thinking about how I should be the example of the baby, I had to act all goody-two-shoes and taking care of when the baby have something. Protecting the baby from danger, the devil side of me kicked in once more. I felt horrible and my hands holding the basket trembles as I frustrates the thought of taking or abandoning the child.

"Oi, what's that basket? Something from the neighbor?" came suddenly my brother's voice from my back.

I responded too slow and he was already coming at me, aiming for the basket. I tried to put it away from him but he was too fast. He lifted the blanked and we both frozen at the sight of black and white kitten curling comfortably in the middle of the blanket.

It was a kitten. A baby alright but a cat baby. A kitten.

I stopped trembling and smile. "We'll have a cat in the house." kitten wins over everything!

-The End-

... ... ... It's frightening how I tend to worries about everything from the good side and the bad side and almost always ended up couldn't take either choice and just spending my time thinking about possibilities. Like that made-up situation, I chose to ponder on whether taking or abandoning the basket without taking any real action. While my brother here, which is short of the solution of the conflict, takes more action.

But that is because he knew nothing. Well, neither did I but the difference is that I think and he's not. Thinking too much won't result on anything while acting too brash without thinking means too depending on luck. This time it turns out to be good just because luck made it that it was kitten that is inside the blanket. WHat if it is actually a baby? What if it is something inhuman in worst case? Oh shit. There. I think too much again.

Well, it is hard not to think when you want to be careful but thinking too much is not good either. Guess we have to keep the balance and life our life as balanced as possible. But being too balanced is not good either! >.<

Okay. Loosing my mind here. Jillie, piss out~!